Porn, Duh!?

You were masturbating while going through my news post history.

da fuck kinda post is this!

Your score for "Keep Fucking That Chicken" is really low, even though I thought it was hilarious.

They're just jealous that you thought of it first!

That's it!

And Bill Gates is black!

You were jacking off to a story in a book. Now whether that was vanilla, BDSM or tentacle porn, one can only wonder.

How's my aim?

(Not my cum aim obviously)

you were jackin off to "never ending dream" the movie with that gay ass white dragon, and the uber long flight scene thing.

Edward from Twilight.

We need clues. Is it a fetish of some sort?

You were masturbating to a furry Hitler sucking Marilyn Monroe's strap-on.

Into water sports, eh?

methionylglutaminylarginyltyrosylglut amylserylleucy-lphenylalanylalanylglu taminylleucyllysylglutamylarginyllysy lglutamy-lglycylalanylphenylalanylval ylprolylphenylalanylvalylthreonylleu-
cylglycylaspartylprolylglycylisoleucy lglutamylglutaminylserylleucyll-ysyli soleucylaspartylthreonylleucylisoleuc ylglutamylalanylglycylala-nylaspartyl alanylleucylglutamylleucylglycylisole ucylprolylphenylala-nylserylaspartylp rolylleucylalanylaspartylglycylprolyl threonylisoleu-cylglutaminylaspfragin ylalanylthreonylleucylarginylalanylph enylal-anylalanylalanylglycylvalylthr eonylprolylalanylglutaminylcysteinyl-
phenylalanylglutamylmethionylleucylal anylleucylisoleucylarginylg-lutaminyl lysylhistidylprolylthreonylisoleucylp rolylisoleucylglycylleuc-ylleucylmeth ionyltyrosylalanylasparaginylleucylva lylphenylalanyla-sparaginyllysylglycy lisoleucylaspartylglutamylphenylalany ltyrosyla-lanylglutaminylcysteinylglu tamyllysylvalylglycylvalylaspartylser ylv-alylleucylvalylalanylaspartylvaly lprolylvalylglutaminylglutamylserylal -anylprolylphenylalanylarginylglutami nylalanylalanylleucylarginylhi-stidyl asparaginylvalylalanylprolylisoleucyl phenylalanylisoleucylcyst-einylprolyl prolylaspartylalanylaspartylaspartyla spartylleucylleucy-larginylglutaminyl isoleucylalanylseryltyrosylglycylargi nylglycyltyrosy-lthreonyltyrosylleucy lleucylserylarginylalanylglycylvalylt hreonylglycy-lalanylglutamylasparagin ylarginylalanylalanylleucylprolylleuc ylas-paraginylhistidylleucylvalylalan yllysylleucyllysylglutamyltyrosylaspa r-aginylalanylalanylprolylprolylleucy lglutaminylglycylphenylalanylgly-cyli soleucylserylalanylprolylaspartylglut aminylvalyllysylalanylalany-lisoleucy laspartylalanylglycylalanylalanylglyc ylalanylisoleucylseryl-glycylserylala nylisoleucylvalyllysylisoleucylisoleu cylglutamylglutamin-ylhistidylasparag inylisoleucylglutamylprolylglutamylly sylmethiony-lleucylalanylalanylleucyl lysylvalylphenylalanylvalylglutaminyl prolyl-methionyllysylalanylalanylthre onylarginylserine?

Oh, that's a real word by the way.

I'm going to come right out and say, everyone is wrong and that word is not the name of a protein, but is in fact, describing every detail of what you were masturbating to.

Ergo, I win. Give me my money, bitch.

Getting off on making people try and guess what gets you off.

Pussysmothering? Something to do with feet? Uniform fetish of some sort?

Vacuum cleaners!

Gotcha, mother fucker.

"You're one of the few people on this site that has the balls to make this sort of thing, and I really respect that!
As for the actual content, it was pretty good; you definitely focused more on "shock value" than animation, as you seem to like doing. Admittedly, it was pretty easy to see the joke coming, but the way you switched scenes so abruptly still got a good laugh out of me. Plus, I kind of have a thing for "shock" material; it just makes me happy that people aren't afraid to indulge in stuff that's taboo under normal circumstances.
Anyway, this was very enjoyable, well done!"

what does this mean in english

You obviously had six dry orgasms not five, HA I'VE GOT YOU AGAIN, but no, keep your pennies I need none just a flex compassidor will do.

Needle in a haystack this game.

Did you jack off over something that isn't human?

(Its like playing Guess Who this)

A stick figure.

It was someone shitting in someone else' mouth.

Or their own mouth.

Or something equally horrifying that wouldn't surprise me.

A specific act? This has even my mind perplexed into the Perfect Plex wrestling finisher hold.

YOU NEVER WATCHED BACK TO THE FUTURE WAT

Happy first anniversary!

That's one year you have been on Newgrounds!

Grabbing...

Grabbing...

I've got nothin'.

Unless...

Could it be...?

... You are a sick, sick man.

I can't guess, there are too many things in the world. I fear that it will forever remain a mystery.

I sometimes try the reverse psychology scam, pretend I don't care anymore, in the small hope that you will reveal your fantasy out of sympathy.

But what is more mysterious and strange is why would I confess that I am in the midst of a Reverse Psychology scam, I mean it completely destroys my plan in its entirety and gives you a further reason not to reveal the Unknown Quantity.

BUT, what if me confessing that I am cooking a Reverse Psychology scam is just an attempt to earn your trust and make you reveal the Unknown Quantity out of pure sympathy and generosity.

What if its like looking into a tv screen and seeing a man watching television and then seeing that on his television screen, he is watching a man watching television... And so on... Where does it stop? Does it change to a woman occasionally? Does it even matter? What is my point? How many television screens can our eyes see inwards? Does anybody care? I care, because we might be a part of the chain, the sequence that never ends until......

The final man is watching his television screen and he doesn't see a man watching television, he sees something quite extrordinary instead, the grand master of all mysteries!

Shall I tell you what he saw? See! Its not fun to not know the answers is it!

I will tell you what the final man saw in his television screen, if you tell me what you jacked off over.... It seems like a lot of trouble to go to for both of us, but we've come this far now and I don't see either of us treading back across our original footprints.....

I know what was on the final TV.

But that way, you get to discover what was on the tv and once again have the upper hand in this deadlock saga and we only get an hint to help us in our quest for the Unknown Quantity AKA Holy Grail.

I will need 21 hours to consider your generous proposal.

Meanwhile, here is some nostalgia that you might enjoy reading to pass the time.

http://nietzlawe.newgrounds.com/news/
post/249791

Roman showers!!

Everything in the world where there's cities and education, there is a system in place that is meant to be adhered to, it doesn't make it THE correct system, it just makes it A system and that particular system is beneficial to someone that wants to control large numbers of people. Its like swearing, swearing is just a word, but people will actually stop themselves from swearing, what makes it different from any other word, that's a form of conditioning in itself. The system makes itself known in many ways, such as 'normal' and 'different' like you said, all these things aid towards dividing and conquering people. People together are a force, but people alone are weak. Create division and classification if you want to obtain control.

I'm a big believer in taking the things that are meant to hurt us and shrug them off, learn to laugh at ourselves, laugh at each other, its a great way of relieving stress, letting go, someone that wants to control you, they want you to become upset by what they cause, but you don't need to let them, none of us do, we are all big and strong enough to deal with words and attitudes because when all is said and done, we're all freaks.

Everything you need to know about England by Nietzlawe: Enjoy: Colons:

http://nietzlawe.newgrounds.com/news/
post/277852

So anyways, I was doing my usual nude jogging the other night and I got 'pulled over.'

I thought the cop was going to be some hot chick that just wanted to get a good look at my tube-steak, but boy, I was wrong.

This mustachio'd motherfucker arrested me for indecent exposure. What the fuck kind of fucking fucker fuck shit is that? Fuck.

I will reveal all.

The final man was watching a television screen, only the actual screen was not a screen, it was a mirror. While looking into this mirror, he could see behind himself and noticed a small camera on the upper wall behind him. He had never noticed this camera before and had never realised that he was at the mercy of 345 voyeuristic perverts, the channel was a long one with many viewers.

The final man had masturbated to something phallic and hadn't realised that his act had been watched by 345 other people. The final man was called:

Stickman91.

The art of Vorarephilia, of course, the thought of being eaten. It can be human on human, giant animal, snakes, crocodiles.

Imagine that the picture of the doughnut you have provided was an actual living beast, and you fell into the centre of the hall. It would be such a tight squeeze, such a rubbery constriction as you slowly sink into the living creature's digestive fluids.

A world that might consume you, meant literally!

http://aryion.com/

Enjoy old chap!

It's funny because I just got done masturbating with a bagel.

Sugar-coated-bagel.

"Yeah, uhh grunt... you're right... uhh... sugar." *Nervous laughter*

Whoa since when have we had animated headers availible

Any new updates on the ol Vore front? What was your predator of choice? I chose a giantess, she likes to take her time, she's evil, she sucks on me for hours at a time before swallowing... She's not a biter and knows that I can't stand the sight of blood, especially my own.

I've had my vore days, back in the day... Of days that consisted of vore.

Snakes make good predators, anacondas/pythons, there was this fictional story on the Big Gulp archives where a snake coiled a human woman, it was hot, the devouring was great, they made some great fake pictures too.

Anything sticky or slimy is good, a venus fly-trap, that would be great.

Vore, one of life's guilty pleasures!

With the venus fly-trap, you fall down, you try to climb back up, digging your fingernails into the slimy sides and you get up a few inches, until you lose your footing and slide all the way back down again. Each time, you get bit nearer, only the problem is that you can never get anywhere near the top, its like an almost vertical slide, you need a grip that you don't possess.

"This time!"

Climbs up, really trying to hug the side, inching your way up through the slime very slowly, hoping that you don't lose your footing. That is until you get a bit further and then you feel it, that familiar feeling of slipping, as you slide back down to the bottom... Where you remain in a pool of digestion fluids.

Vore, one of life's guilty pleasures! Again...

Vore will always hold a place in my heart, in the Big Gulp days. I don't feel guilty about it at all, its just a saying. Now and again its fun to do a bit of vore roleplaying, its just imagination, energy and fantasy, just an opportunity to let go really and experience a feeling of giving yourself to another being.

I can't walk past that bagel without thinking its going to grab my leg......

A strap-on dildo (also strap-on, dildo harness) is a dildo designed to be worn, usually with a harness, during sexual activity. Harnesses and dildos are made in a wide variety of styles, with variations in how the harness fits the wearer, how the dildo attaches to the harness, as well as various features intended to facilitate stimulation of the wearer or a sexual partner.
A strap-on dildo can be used for a wide variety of sexual activities, including solo or mutual masturbation, as well as penetrative oral, anal, or vaginal sex. Sexual lubricant is often used to ease insertion.

Strap-on dildos can be used by people of any sex or gender, upon people of any sex or gender. A person who does not have a penis may use a strap-on, as may a person whose penis does not allow for penetration, whether due to size or function. A person who does not want to use their penis for penetration may instead use a strap-on; this may include some trans women. Trans men may use strap-on dildos in order to facilitate experiencing sexual activity as many biological males do. People who are genderqueer or enjoy gender-bending may use a strap-on during sex in order to enjoy related forms of gender expression. Strap-on dildos are also used in kink scenes: those involving forced feminization of a man may involve the use of a strap-on upon that man, while those involving orgasm denial may involve a man using a strap-on upon a partner, to limit the amount of sexual stimulation which that man receives.

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Antidisestablishmentarianism.
or
Pneumonoultromicroscopicsilicovolcano coniosis?